Joke of the day

[kiwikrasher]

What has a 9V battery and a woman’s butt hole got in common?

You know it’s wrong, but one day you won’t be able to help yourself and sick your tongue on it

[StMarks]

Well guys, do you find you're struggling to get your wife's attention these days ??




Instant remedy -Just sit down & look comfortable...

[StMarks]

[Stonesie]

[StMarks]

Throws doubt on Mr Darwin's concept..

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[StMarks]

Every morning I take my old dairy cow Daisy to her paddock, via the long and scenic route that runs through our local vineyard..
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Yep, that's right.: I herd it through the garpevines..



I'll get my coat

[Monty]

[Kwacky]

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[Stonesie]

[Cav]

[StMarks]

This year’s Top 15 jokes from the Edinburgh Festival

1. I was going to sail around the globe in the world’s smallest ship but I bottled it. - Mark Simmons

2. I've been taking salsa lessons for months, but I just don't feel like I'm progressing. It's just one step forward... two steps back. - Alec Snook

3. Ate horse at a restaurant once - wasn’t great. Starter was all right but the mane was dreadful. - Alex Kitson

4. I sailed through my driving test. That’s why I failed it. - Arthur Smith

5. I love the Olympics. My friend and I invented a new type of relay baton: well, he came up with the idea, I ran with it.- Mark Simmons

6. My dad used to say to me “Pints, gallons, litres” – which, I think, speaks volumes - Olaf Falafel

7. British etiquette is confusing. Why is it highbrow to look at boobs in an art gallery but lowbrow when I get them out in Spoons? - Chelsea Birkby

8. I wanted to know which came first the chicken or the egg so I bought a chicken and then I bought an egg and I think I've cracked it. - Masai Graham

9. My partner told me that she’d never seen the film Gaslight. I told her that she definitely had - Zoë Coombs Marr

10. The conspiracy theory about the moon being made of cheese was started by the hallouminati. - Olaf Falafel

11. I’m an extremely emotionally needy non-binary person: my pronouns are ‘there there’. - Sarah Keyworth

12. I've got a girlfriend who never stops whining. I wish I'd never bought her that vineyard - Roger Swift

13. Gay people are very bad at maths. We don't naturally multiply. - Lou Wall

14. Keir Starmer looks like an AI-generated image of a substitute teacher - Sophie Duker

15. Growing up rich is a hereditary condition. It affects 1% of people - Olga Koch

[kiwikrasher]

[kiwikrasher]

[StMarks]

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[Kwacky]

https://youtu.be/fC2RyIiQd-I?si=7UtZgoKcIitjiY0w

[Stonesie]

[D6Nutz]

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[StMarks]

Not "a joke" as such, but you've got to laugh....

https://www.independent.co.uk/news/berl ... 31166.html

[kiwikrasher]

Not "a joke" as such, but you've got to laugh....

https://www.independent.co.uk/news/berl ... 31166.html

That’s a bit insane

[StMarks]

Today it's 10 years to the day, since my mate ran out of the room with tears streaming down his cheeks & screaming to us "It's a boy, it's a boy,,,"
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To this day, he has never been back to Thailand.