Tank Slap - Motorcycle Forum

My lad is 10. Last month he got his blackbelt in Taekwondo. He took it with adults, at adult standard. He trained and revised for 6 months to pass. He's the youngest in his club to get their 1st dan.

Last summer he entered the World TKD Championship and won his division. My 10 year old son, a world champ. I sat in the ICC with tears rolling down my face.

He's made me massively proud over these last few months. Just when I thought it couldn't get any better, he got an invite to train with the national squad.

So what's he going to do? Quit. He's giving up taekwondo, he's bored with it.

I could cry. I've tried to tell him what he's giving up. But I see it from his perspective. Half of his life he's spent training, practicing and fighting. He gave up a lot to get ready for his black belt. He's still a kid. I've got to let him be a kid. It's the summer time, he's got his little squad, he's leaving junior school next month, he wants to be out with his mates. This Saturday I've got my grading. He's helping out with the juniors. It'll be the last time he wears his uniform.

It breaks my heart, but I've left him to it. I can't push him, he's really had enough of it. All I can hope for is that he gets his interest back in a couple of years.

I'm torn when it comes to things like this..

I completely see both sides of the argument and understand exactly why you've done it, however, if Scott Redding's dad didn't push him he would never have made it to MotoGP because he would have quit in his teens.

One thing that can never be taken away from your lad is what he's achieved.. that's amazing and I hope he realises just how amazing that it!!

You made the right choice.....he's got to want it, no-one else. He'll come back to it in time....or not, it makes no difference.

I mean, you have no qualms about changing teams at work, right?? In his mind he's doing pretty much the same thing.

Aside from the fact my lad neither knows nor cares which team I'm in at work, you can't seriously be comparing my move to him giving up taekwondo? It's not like I'm giving up law (or that I'm any good at it).

I'm just saying that's it's a big deal for him at that age, that's all...in his mind school is his equivalent of work....anything beyond that has to be his own choice.

Difficult.

Is there a time limit on the offer? Could you go back to them and ask them to defer while he thinks about it.

Or bribe him to go and try it?

His licence has expired now so we would need to renew that before anything else.

But to be honest, unless he wants to do it, what's the point? I can't throw him in the car, drive him there and force him to get involved. It's not like he's half committed, he's just had enough. He doesn't want to do it any more.

His mates from taekwondo will call him up and talk him into it...you watch.

Hi main friend dropped out at Christmas, he was due to do his black belt at the same time as my son.

Now that's going to be something he'll regret when he's older. Being that close to becoming a black belt and quitting.

There you go then....YOUR lad will be the one who calls the other lad up & talks him back into it.

No right or wrong answer to this one Rich, but either way he's achieved something you can both be very proud of.

I'm not sure it's a similar parallel Kwacky, but MiniGee played rugby for our local 11 & unders team until he'd had enough following the 13/14 season, he was doing well and was learning all the time, however he just decided he'd had enough of playing rugby.

This week he's decided that come next season he's going back to it again and will be training for it over the summer holiday. He isn't World Class like your lad and at best will probably only play at a local level, but kids change and grow and change their minds as they become older - it's just part of growing up.

Like you I accepted his decision at the time and asked if he was really sure, he was and that was it I respected his decision, but 3yrs later he's said he thinks he made a mistake, there's a strong possibility that young Kwacky may come to the same decision in his own time, give him enough space and time and he may come to the same conclusion as my lad.

That's pretty much my thinking. I can't force him. Hopefully he'll miss it later on and make a return.

You've done the right thing Kwacky and it can't be easy to watch him walk away from such achievements but be proud of what your lad has achieved and yourself for making the right decision in a very difficult dilemma.

Kwacky wrote:That's pretty much my thinking. I can't force him. Hopefully he'll miss it later on and make a return.

Yep....you never drive them, just steer them, I reckon.

Difficult but I think he is old enough to know what he wants. He might miss it in6 months and want to go back to it.

Saturday was his swansong. He's really turning his back on it. It was a shame as he helped out at the grading, doing all of the patterns at the back of the group so that the other pupils could follow him if need be for guidance. He smashed them all. I got to partner him in set sparring, which was a bit of a mistake as we didn't take it seriously and I messed up one bit, but then we both went for it and walked away with bruises.

It was a big turn out as 3 classes were there. Alex got loads of comments and compliments about him being a black belt. I think the penny finally dropped - I've been telling him for the last year that no one cares about red belts or black tags - everyone knows it's hard work to get a back belt.

When it all ended I gave him a big hug and shed a tear. It's the end of an era. Hopefully with the rest of the family carrying on he'll retain some interest, no matter how small.

In a similar twist, Finn has decided he doesn't want to go to Cubs anymore.

It's not in the same league as Alex, he hasn't put nearly the amount of effort in but since Beavers we've invested quite some time in his endeavours and he's seemed to love it.

But now his friend has left and started going to youth club instead, all of a sudden he doesn't want to go anymore.

Which is a shame as the local Cub/Scout/Beaver group is struggling for leaders, the parents have been having to help out to make sure the kid's can do all the stuff they want to. Which we didn't mind, but we'll have to can that now if he stops going.
Looking after my kids is bad enough!

Kwacky

I'm not a father so honestly I can't and to be fair wouldn't be right to comment on whether you should try to encourage him to carry on or not BUT remember if it wasn't for the love and support you and your family gave him to get to that point he would probably never of got there, so surely you have achieved a huge amount and he has had an AMAZING time going through all his tests and becoming WORLD CLASS. I'm pretty sure when he gets to secondary school NONE of the other kids will have stories like his so on a personal level I think he will strive for the best in life and when it comes to his GCSEs he will think back to what he went through for his WORLD CLASS TITLE and think he can do ANYTHING if he puts his mind to it being so young.

I don't see why you should feel upset or confused on your feelings you've taught him to strive to get the best and being so young I don't see how that's not the best, surely people have worked their whole life and NEVER get to that stage! So maybe when one door closes another one opens???? Could take him to watch some other sports and maybe he will think of getting into that?

I personally think life is about variety and that's what makes life so special and forefilling, love comes from this, experience comes from this, happiness comes from this, it can be a bugger at times and sometimes can throw curve balls but that's what makes it fun and brings in knowledge to people.

Also on a side note I'm pretty sure none of the other lads will steal his lunch money

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You've got a wise head on those young shoulders Rossgo. Thanks for that. What you say makes perfect sense.