D41 wrote:I think if you're going to make a life with someone.... girlfriend, spouse, partner or whatever, then you need your own place to call home.....not somewhere that someone else calls home.
Everyone has there own ideas and outlook. Doesn’t mean just because someone else’s doesn’t fit yours that theirs are wrong or invalid.
In the majority of dynamics, yeah in-laws aren’t your first choice of house partner. And everyone is entitled to their opinion on what they would do in that situation.
But that doesn’t make Cav’s choices wrong. They are right for him and knowing him they would have been discussed and deliberated to some great length with those involved.
Plenty of cultures embrace the extended family collective living, including Māoris, and I was exposed to that dynamic a lot growning up in NZ.
He specifically said ideally an self contained area or annex for the in-laws. It’s just like having neighbours you actually like.
And the concept of someone willing to take on care responsibilities for your ASD child when you pass is something you could not even comprehend the weight of unless you are a parent of a special needs child.
For the record I would’ve had my exes mum live with us in a heartbeat. She is one of the most kindest and caring people I know. Unfortunately her husband (ex FIL) was a struggle just to have as a tenant in my rental.
Good luck to you Cav.